It's All About ME

The whole premise of this blog was so I could talk about me. Me is my favorite subject. What could possibly be more interesting than ME? To prove this point, I am accepting a tag from Amanda. Besides, I have to make up for talking about someone else on my blog. Trust me...this is going to be fascinating.

10 years ago--
I received an upgrade as the Bionic Woman. Actually, I got a spiffy new metal shoulder. Replaced the half metal/half donor bone I had before. I now set off metal detectors at the airport but sadly, no magnets stick to me. Now I could officially say I had artificial humor. (See? Fascinating!)
And I was stupidly waiting for a missionary...yeah, that was a waste of two good dating years! But that's another post for another day...maybe.

5 Things on my to do list today were:
1. Decorate cake
2. Deliver cake along with da Boo and birthday present
3. Go to mall and herd children for Build-A-Bear party
4. Try not to sit at my computer, eating chocolate all afternoon after said party
5. Go to Plan B for dinner tonight because I don't feel like going to the store (supposed to have rotisserie chicken so I can make BBQ chicken pizza later in the week but it's gonna be spaghetti and meatballs instead!)

Snacks I enjoy----
Chocolate. My current favorite are those orange jelly sticks covered in dark chocolate. Also a few sips of Cherry Chocolate Diet Dr Pepper. I also have these 100 calorie packets of microwave kettle corn and those are quite enjoyable.

Things I would do if I were suddenly a Billionaire:
GET A DOG! Because this will be my money, right? It doesn't belong to the Man so he doesn't get to pick, right?
Hire a housekeeper for once a week...someone to clean the bathrooms, mop the floors...stuff I really hate to do.
Pay off our house and van.
Pay off my parents' "house"
Get serious about publishing my book.
Take the entire extended family on a vacation to Devil's Tower so we could run around it, clapping out hands together and pretending to ride horses...again.
Give a lot of money to charitable organizations that I believe are doing some real good.

3 of my bad habits---
1. Utter lack of "won't" power.
2. Extremely opinionated.
3. Tendency to get lost blog-hopping instead of doing the laundry (kinda like right now).

Jobs I've had:
Babysitter (I wasn't very good)
Cookie store at the mall (sold those giant cookie cakes, grew to hate the smell of coffee and the taste of macadamia nuts)
Telemarketing (sold credit cards...please don't hate me!)
Market Research (paid people to take taste tests, try out products, etc., which was really fun unless it was the weeks we were testing diapers...)
Mervyn's (still trying to block the memories)
Receptionist at aloe vera product company (routinely hit on by the illegal aliens working in the warehouse)
Product Line Manager at same aloe vera company (here's a tip: we made our money in the shipping fees!)
Volunteer Recording Program (read textbooks onto tape for blind students and possibly my most favorite paid job)
Assistant to financial adviser (was so not suited for that job but I stayed for nearly 3 years because apparently I am a masochist)
Momma (hardest work I've ever done but also the best)

5 Things people don't know about me----
1. I once hit a car in a restaurant parking lot and then drove away! (that's probably my darkest secret...so glad to get that off my chest! And before you start throwing stones, I was only 17 and scared! And stupid!)
2. I once got out of a ticket by crying.
3. I really like reading the Junie B. Jones books to da Boo. They make me laugh!
4. There are a total of 7 scars on my body from surgeries.
5. While I am a friendly person and talk to a lot of people, I really don't have that many friends, and by friends, I mean the people you can call at 5 in the morning to come watch your kids while you go to the emergency room, the people who surprise you with plates of cookies for no reason other than they wanted to do that, the people who don't treat me differently because I cannot raise my right arm to the square. Those are my friends. And you know who you are.

And now my turn to tag...Brooke, Suzanne, Wendiloo, and the other Brooke.