Friday Confessional #5

I confess...

I like to torture my kids. Okay, maybe that doesn't sound right; I don't want anyone calling CPS on me.

I like to pester, tease, and taunt my kids. That's better.

It's great when I know the punchline to their jokes before they give it. They are extremely trusting and just a little too ticklish. I make up silly songs involving them and their various faults character traits. Hey, it's not like I sing them in public...much.

I confess...

April Fool's Day is like giving me a free pass to make them miserable all day long! Last year, I had pneumonia and too busy not dying. This year, I think it's safe to say that I made up for that.

Somehow, Boo's clock got set an hour later so she came rushing into my room, all frantic that she missed the bus. I could hardly go back to sleep, I was cackling with glee.

Then the Boy woke up looking like this:

It was only fair, since he missed out when the leprechaun visited. He didn't seem to mind. In fact, he begged me to let it stay on so he could show his friends at school.

When I fixed Boo's hair for school, I tucked in a hair clip with pink and blue hair attached. Unfortunately, her brother pointed it out to her before she left. She loved it. Hrmm...maybe I was losing my touch.

I let the suspense build all morning. When lunch came without any more incidents, the Boy didn't think it was odd that I was taking pictures of him while he ate. I even gave him Oreos! I must be the coolest mom ever! At least until he ate those cookies.

Here's the Before shot:

And the After.

Some naughty person had replaced the "white stuff" in his second Oreo with toothpaste! Yuck! I just love his eyebrows! They are the most expressive part of him. Boo had a similar experience with her lunch, which she thought was perfectly safe since it was a prepackaged Lunchable that hadn't been tampered with...that she could tell.

Boo brought a friend home from school. Before I agreed to the play date, I asked the friend's aunt if it would be alright if I played pranks on him along with my kids. I am pleased to say that she whole-heartedly agreed.

It's not unusual for me to provide a really fun treat or new snack when the kids have a friend over. In fact, they've come to expect it. So when I brought out these awesome, giant SweetTarts, their eyes shone with joy...until they tasted them. Not SweetTarts...fizzing bath beads.

We were going to teach Boo's friend a new game but we ran out of time. It's a game my parents used to teach all the new missionaries that came over for dinner, one involving a piece of paper with a bullseye drawn on it, a quarter, someone's nose to roll it down, and a really soft-leaded pencil with which to trace the quarter where it fell. Those are some great memories.

I confess...

I get my mean streak through genetics.

No Foolin'

So...it was April Fool's Day. And I did nothing. I didn't even tell a lame joke. Major fail on my part.

Instead of cackling with glee at the misery confusion I caused my children with little pranks all day long, I took a car trip to deliver my niece back to her mother. And then I discovered a whole new section of my personal hell by driving through one of the deadliest canyons during a near-blizzard. But at least I now have absolute faith in my abilities to correct a fishtail while facing down a semi truck.

No real post for now. And maybe not another one until I've decided whether or not I should reconsider the whole Happy Pills things.

Miss me while I'm gone (out of my mind)...

April Fool's! What? I'm not late...just building the suspense

Yeah, so I finally got the April Fool's Day pictures on my computer! I think I might have had a little too much fun that day...

First off, I switched their clothes in the morning. I usually lay out both of the kids outfits in specific places so when I tell them to go get dressed, there's no whining about what to wear. They thought that was all I was going to do to them.


While da Boo was at school, her room was quarantined and the door locked. She didn't notice until nearly dinner time. Not the most observant of children. Would have been better if I had some yellow "caution" tape on there, too.

The Boy and I played a joke on the Man. He gave him a card that was glued shut. Then the Man played a joke on me. I have a wireless mouse and he put a sticky note on the sensor. Unfortunately, he did this after the kids had been playing on my computer so I thought they had done something to it. Not as funny as he intended but I'm proud of him for getting into the spirit of the day.

Dinner was normal. The kids were looking at me out of the corner of their eyes by now, wondering what I was up to. But all seemed well. Then the Boy asked for a drink. I told them that since they'd been pretty good all day, I had strawberry soda for them.


So what's so tricky about this? Well, the picture is upside down. That's strawberry jello in their cups!

Then came bedtime treat. Imagine their surprise when they sat down to this:


Chicken nuggets with french fried? Has Mom completely lost it? Actually, it was Oreo cookies covered in peanut butter and coated in crushed corn flakes. The fries were made from thin strips of breadstick dough that had been rolled in sugar and baked. The "ketchup" is strawberry jam. These are all ideas from FamilyFun magazine.

April Baby

I think Mother Nature got in on the April Fool's Day fun...there's new snow on the ground this morning. March is certainly going out like a lamb - a big, fluffy, white, cold lamb.

Sorry I haven't been around lately. My computer refused to open a browser window. No worries, the Man is a computer genius. He'll have it working in no time, right? Well, it's kinda like the plumber's wife who has the leaky faucet...eventually he got to it. I have an FHE post for you! Aren't you so happy?

And of course, I have something planned for the kids in honor of April Fool's Day. Can I just say that I love Family Fun magazine? They are awesome! I really wanted to do this prank but I have a hair appointment tonight and I might not be back in time for dinner. No worries. I got dessert covered. My kids are so going to need therapy after today. Mwahahahah!

Did you play on pranks today?

Dinner With A Fool

I like holidays. Some holidays I get a little too excited about. This was the first year I actually had a plan for April Fool's Day: I was going to make dinner! While making dinner, itself, is not exactly spectacular (unless I manage to not ruin it), what I had planned was different. Invited to take part were my mom (also my partner in crime), the Man, the Co-ed and Aunt Denise.

When they arrived, the table was set and there was a salad with a bottle of dressing on the table. The Co-ed looked a little nervous...after the last salad I served her, I don't think she knew what to expect. When everyone was seated, I announced that in honor of April Fool's Day, we were going to go a little crazy and have dinner backwards. Dessert would be served first. Then, I brought out this:


Mmmmm...looks delectable, right? And still, everyone seemed a little less than at ease. As I cut into the cake, it was the Man that guessed: the cake wasn't a cake at all. It was meatloaf, covered in mashed potatoes, with cherry tomatoes and ketchup as decoration. But the Boy didn't believe me when I told him it wasn't cake. He brought me his plate, asking so very sweetly for some cake. I finally let him have a taste of the "frosting." The look on his face was horrified - and priceless. I told him to go spit it out in the trash. But that wasn't good enough...he threw up. So dinner was off to a less-than-stellar beginning...

After "dessert" was finished, I brought out the main course:


These grilled cheese sandwiches looked so real that both kids burst into tears when I told them this was their bedtime treat. It took some heavy persuading, some sniffing, and finally very cautious bites to convince the kids that the "sandwiches" were actually slices of toasted pound cake schmeared with cheese-colored frosting. But once they were deemed edible, the kids woofed 'em down! Now I have to find something just as convincing for next year.

Other pranks played: I gave da Boo an unsolveable maze. She loves mazes and quickly became very frustrated with this one. She does not appreciate a good joke. Later on, she pranked called me. Asked if my refrigerator was running. So next year, I am going to do this to the kids. I'd tell you more but I really ought to go catch my fridge...