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Sunday, February 6, 2011

Top Ten Reasons Why It Sucks When Your Husband Is Out Of Town

This is a repost from two years ago. The Man was recently out of town for two whole stinkin' weeks. I barely made it. My two main forms of survival came from a gift certificate to See's chocolates and a trip to the local Ikea.


I'm not saying the Man really is out of town (because I'm paranoid enough, people) but if he were...these are the reasons why it would potentially suck. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

  1. My feet are perpetually cold. There's no one to warm them up at night. No way am I wearing socks. Maybe we should rent a dog for when the Man isn't here to fulfill his duties.
  2. I have to change all stinky diapers. Sure, Boo takes care of the wet one but the messy diapers are still a little too gross for her delicate constitution.
  3. All trespassing spiders receive a stay of execution. So the spider in the bathroom gets to live trapped underneath that cup for a little while longer.
  4. I have to get up when the kids do and get them breakfast. Usually, the Man feeds them and then heads off to work so I get to snooze a little while longer to catch up on the sleep I missed while spending "quality time" with Baby in the wee hours of the morning.
  5. Bored, bored, bored. It's a good thing I joined Facebook or I'd have no idea what to do with all this empty time.
  6. My panic attacks are going into overdrive, especially at night when I'm trying to fall asleep. Was that the heater turning on? Or was it a band of vicious burglars breaking down the garage door? Was that one of the kids coughing in their sleep? Or are they silently choking to death while I just lay here? Such happy thoughts...
  7. There's no tag-team. And my split personality doesn't count.
  8. I have to do all the Man Jobs. I got married so I wouldn't have to take out the trash anymore. Too bad the kids are still too young to haul the big trash can down to the curb...
  9. There's no escaping them! I am the only adult present and am therefore the only one who can supervise baths, break up fights, refill drink cups, deliver punishments, distribute bribes, and run away from tickle attacks.
  10. No one to cuddle with on the couch while watching tv. No big hugs when he gets home from work. No kisses to reassure me that he is still head-over-heels in love with me.

If the Man
really were gone, then I would really be missing him right now...

What do you to when your Significant Other is away?


Debbie said...

So, so true! There is something so wonderful about being able to split things up and also have someone to kill the spiders:)

Erin said...

My husband is going out of town for a week soon and I am NOT looking forward to it. I am tempted to drive 5 hours to stay at my mom's house, but that means the kids would miss school. And I never sleep well while he's gone. But hey, the silver lining - I might actually write blog posts and comment on friends' after the kids go to bed at night! (Since I usually spend time with him instead.)

Brooke said...

Movies, to-do lists and dinner out. But my favorite is to release the children to a grandparent and go with him (that happens a lot less than I would like it to.)

Mary~Momathon said...

oh no. That post nearly sent me over the edge because that's what it's like when my husband IS home. I think if he left town, I wouldn't really notice. Hmmm.

hairyshoefairy said...

I have a movie night with my kids before bedtime then I revert back to my night owl ways and stay up until 3 or 4 a.m. doing stuff I've been meaning to do on the computer but can't while the kids are awake. I actually rather enjoy getting the time to myself once in a while. Plus I polish my toenails and watch girly movies that he would only mock the whole time.

Mary said...

I go crazy when the hubby is gone...well, I did when he was gone for 3 months. And now he's getting ready to be gone for 4 months! I'm not looking forward to it!

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