"If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under." - Ronald Reagan

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Open Letters…Again

It's been awhile since I've written an open letter but I constantly write them in my head, things I can't say to the actual person/corporate entity/personified noun - but what I really want to say.

__________

Dear Wal-Mart,

We kinda have a love/hate relationship. You love my money and I hate shopping there. While I appreciate the "upgrades" you made during the recent remodel, with your expanded cake decorating section and soda selection, there is one thing I just can't handle. It's those dang automated video ads.
Keep in mind that 95% of the time I roam your overly-bright aisles, I am just there because it's late, we're out of milk/bread/chocolate (you know…the essentials), and I'm too tired/stressed/lazy to drive the two miles to my preferred grocery store. It is in this less-than attentive state that I happen to walk by one of the many screens you've placed that are set to play commercials for the myriad items in that location. Nothing about the perky voice or enthusiastic advertising should be threatening but I never fail to jump out of my skin.
And dude, I'm already there and not gonna leave without spending at least $50 so do you really have to keep pushing even more things I don't need? Save it for early in the morning, when I need something exciting to get me out of bed, like the new and improved scent of fabric softener or yet another form of sugared carbohydrates.

I hate you,
Jessica G.

__________

Dear Soccer,

At first it was pretty cool being your mom, like earning a merit badge or leveling up on the video game of life.
But these early morning games on Saturday? Not cool.
Fix it or so help me, next season I will put him in horseback riding lessons.

Not even kidding when it comes to my sleep,
Jessica G.

5 comments:

Christine Rains said...

I feel the same way when it comes to Wal-Mart. Why do they need those video screens anyway? I am not looking forward to any early mornings when my son is big enough to want to play sports. I think I'll send his father with him!

The Ransoms said...

I would much rather take horse riding lessons. I keep looking around for a place that offers cheap horse riding.

Odie Langley said...

I think we would be amazed at how high a percentage of people do hate to shop at Walmart. I love the atmosphere in our smaller grocery stores but sometimes I can only find certain items at the other place that has only 2 of their 25 registers open. I was blessed that none of my 3 girls ever participated in sports so I didn't have to worry about getting them to practices but I did have one that got into acting and I had to drive her to practices at NC Wesleyan College and some nights we were quite late getting home so I do understand.
Odie

Grumpy Grateful Mom said...

Hahaha! I feel the same about dance. It's too much work for me! Yes, horseback riding. They offer lessons near my house. :)

Miss Angie said...

I love writing open letters. Such a great release!

I dislike wal mart and only go there if I absolutely have to.

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