When Target Fails

I love Target. Those big red carts and luscious aisles of stuff make my heart beat faster. I get doe-eyed just thinking about the place. I cover my notebook with "I heart Target" and "Mrs. Jessica Target" all the time. This is more than a crush, this is true love, people! So imagine the heartbreak when Target let me down. Devastating. Like when Edward left Bella in New Moon.

Let me explain.

Da Boo is short. This is my fault. I was always the shortest in my class. She is so short that I am frequently asked if she and the Boy are twins. No, they're two and half years apart! But because she is "vertically challenged," it was rather difficult to find a backpack that didn't hang down to her knees. I even tried the toddler backpacks but it had to be big enough to carry a full-sized folder home and none of those measured up. So I went to Target, because Target always has what I need.

But not this time.

Oh, sure, we found a backpack da Boo loved and immediately clasped to her bosom. It had all of her favorite things: flowers, hearts and poodles. And it was pink. Perfection in canvas form. But just when she declared this backpack to be the very best one she had ever, ever, ever seen, I noticed something. It was the flowers...their centers looked a little funny; not quite symmetrical. That's when I saw what they were: skulls. Seriously. Skulls. On a little girls' pink backpack. Apparently symbols of death are all the rage in grade school because I began to see the hidden skulls on all the other backpack designs. Wha...?

But it was too late. I knew that look in her eyes and unless I wanted a repeat of "Firestarter," I had better slink to the checkout and plunk down my money for those pink skulls. Sigh...

I tried to find a replacement. We even found a sparkly purple nylon backpack that almost had her won over but, alas...no poodles. So I did the next best thing: I got crafty. First, I used a black permanent marker and colored in all the skulls. While it looked better, the skulls were still slightly visible, even after three layers of marker. No problem. I had some glittery pinkish purple puff paint. Success! The flowers now had sparkly centers and were no longer omens of doom.


The finished product! She thought it was lots better than the original backpack and wanted to wear it to bed. That's the ultimate seal of approval here...if it makes it into my kids' bedtime horde.


But, Target? If you ever let me down like that again and make my daughter go giddy over skulls, I'm going to have to leave you. And really, neither of us wants that to happen.